


Penance

by NovemberWings



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Avengers: Endgame (Movie), Childhood Trauma, Cute, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Nebula & Tony Stark Friendship, Nebula (Marvel) Has Issues, Other, Past Child Abuse, That scene where they're playing, Tony Stark Has A Heart
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-06
Updated: 2019-05-06
Packaged: 2020-02-26 21:54:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,550
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18725722
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NovemberWings/pseuds/NovemberWings
Summary: Being on the broken down ship is incredibly boring so Tony suggests they play some Midguardian games. However, when Nebula loses it triggers something and she knows that losing comes hand in hand with something else; punishment.Tony Stark has other ideas.





	Penance

The ship was quiet and soon both Nebula and Tony had discovered that when they weren’t working on trying to fix the ship it became extremely boring and tedious. So Tony had come up with the idea to teach Nebula some Midguardian games. Most of them involved manipulating paper and were quite easy; meaning she picked them up quickly and every time they played a real game she had won. She had demanded no penance off Tony… she liked him and despite what most people thought of her, especially her sister, she never wanted to win so the other could experience pain. She never even wanted to win to avoid pain herself. She just wanted to win to prove to herself that she could win.

That she was good enough.

Every time she won she felt the rush of excitement but accepted her win with grace. She didn’t gloat and never once dreamt of hurting Tony as penance.

Soon Tony managed to come up with another Midguardian game; ‘noughts and crosses’ he had called it. He sat down explained the rules to her, which were extremely simple and they started playing. They did a best of three.

Tony won the first, and she was shocked, but she could still win the overall game. Tony drew out another grid and he went first. She placed down her crosses followed by his noughts and with horror she realised that where ever she placed her next cross Tony would win, and from the grin on his face he knew it.

She felt the crush of defeat in her chest and could feel her heart, of flesh, start to palpitate with fear. She closed her eyes for a moment and let out a shaky breath before pencilling in the lines that would sigh her fate. She watched the inevitable as Tony won the game and lay back in his chair, grinning ear to ear.

And she found she was scared. She hadn’t face punishment for losing in such a ridged way in a while now, and as much as she tried to repress it she could remember her father’s sparring grounds, being pinned to the floor by Gamora and inevitable being dragged away for her punishment. It had been so long since her last punishment and she was out of practice. Her emotions were everywhere.

But there was another variable at play. She didn’t know what penance Tony would want from her. She knew nothing about Midguardian punishment. She didn’t know the type of punishment or the extremity of it. While she was pretty sure it wouldn’t be even as close to that of Thanos’ the idea of Tony being the one to implicate the punishment frightened and upset to an amount that surprised her. The thing was Thanos often punished her. It was just the way things were but with Tony she held him as a friend and had never once hurt her. She didn’t want their relationship to be like her and her father’s. 

She felt her breathing start to grow heavy before she sniffed a lot of air in to calm herself. No point getting upset. No amount of crying can change the inevitable.  
“So…” She started, feeling anxious, scared and awkward, “my penance?”

The grin fell off Tony’s face and he sat up straighter in his chain, leaning forward, almost making her want to cringe back away from him. She didn’t understand what was happening.  
“I’m sorry?” He asked frowning slightly. She wasn’t the best at understanding emotions, let alone Midguardian emotion (it’s so complicated). Maybe he was mocking her? Wallowing in her failure. While she saw red at the notion, at how she was being played with, she understood that it was his right.  
“My punishment… for losing the game?” Her hands were shaking a little now, so she clasped them together in her lap. It was always worse if they saw you were afraid of their power and their pain.  
“Punishment? For the game?” Tony echoed dumbly back. “What punishment?” She scoffed.  
“Come on, Stark, out with it. I know the rules. If you lose in combat you are punished to ensure that it doesn’t happen again. My punishment.” She demanded, her voice cold and emotionless. Tony looked horrified at what he had just heard.  
“There wasn’t any combat!”  
“There was a combat of wits which I lost. What punishment do you demand?”  
“Oh my God! Nothing!” He stood up, moving away from her. “Nebula, I’m not going to punish you for losing at noughts and crosses!”  
“But it’s the proper way.” She frowned in confusion. He didn’t want penance.  
“No, it’s not! You don’t punish people when they loose stupid games. Or ever really.” He held up his hands in shock and an almost placating gesture.  
“So you don’t do penance on Earth?”  
“No.” he hesitated, “well… we do but only if you’ve done something really bad… not for loosing a game and I imagine your idea of penance is very different from mine.”  
“So you don’t want penance?” Her voice warbled. Only now that hope was in sight did she suddenly start feeling the emotion that was coursing through her veins. She could feel her throat tighten and the back of her eyes begin to burn with tears. She suddenly realised how badly her body was shaking.  
“No. No penance, Nebula.” Tony shook his head.  
“Oh.” She said and her voice broke. There was a tense moment of silence and Nebula couldn’t hold it back any more. Tears started flowing from her eyes down her metallic cheeks. She was crying from relief, but grief she had not let herself feel before. Grief from Gamora’s death but also the death of the child hood she was denied… grief for the person she could have been if not for their father. She was never allowed the play silly, childhood games, rid of the pressure of penance. She missed the life she never had. Her tears were silent, but inside she was screaming and cursing. Emotion she didn’t know how to express and she felt suffocated by her lack of knowledge of the language of expression. A language a universal translator couldn’t comprehend or teach.

Tony started walking over to her side of the table and she felt a spark of fear reignite in her chest. If must have shown outwardly because Tony paused for a moment, raising his hands to show them empty, before continuing with more slow caution.  
“I’m not going to hurt you.”  
She nodded and deep down she knew that was true.

He took a seat next to her and for a moment they sat awkwardly before Tony reached out a put a hand on top of her shaking hand, touching her for the first time. She stilled. He was touching her without wanting to hurt her and she was unsure what to do.  
“I’m not a child to coddle, Stark.” She snapped venomously.  
“I know.” Tony shrugged nonchalantly, “but sometimes adults could use some comfort too. I know I’ve need comfort in my life.” He left his hand on hers. They sat in silence as Nebula calmed herself down. When she was calm Tony cautiously squeezed her hand, and while she would never say, it felt amazing.

“Can I ask you a question?”  
“If it’s about my childhood; no.”  
“Okay… well I was going to ask… if demanded punishment is normal for you how come you never demanded penance from me? You’ve beat me a load of times.”  
“Well…” And if she could have blushed she would have, “I like you. You’re nice and a didn’t want to hurt you.”  
“That makes sense. That’s why I don’t want to hurt you.” Tony smiled and her head snapped round to look at him.  
“You like me?” She asked, doubt almost palpable in the air.  
“Yeah. You’re a good person, Nebula. Now. Give me a hug.” He opened his arms wide and waited for her to lean in. She stayed still and raised an eyebrow at me. “Come on,” he coaxed shimming his shoulders a little, “no one’s going to see I promise.” She rolled her eyes and lent in for a quick squeeze.

But when she was enveloped in Tony’s arms she found it was nicer than she had thought. He was warm and soft and gentle. She had never felt anything like it. She felt herself welling up again, and pulled back before she could start crying again. She leant back and looked into her lap, wiping at her eyes, knowing that Tony was watching her.  
“Thanks.” She muttered into her chest. Thank you for hugging me. Thank you for not demanded any penance at all. Thank you for being here. Alone would have been so much harder.  
“No problem.” He smiled, she looked up at smiled back at him. An awkward tight smile, clumsy from lack of practice, but with meaning behind it. “Fancy getting some food?” He asked standing up, his stomach growling. She nodded and started to follow him down the corridor of the ship listening to his nonsensical rambling of ‘imagine if we could order a pizza…’.

But she knew that despite his nonsense and crazy ideas she was so incredibly grateful that he’s here.

And that she’s not alone.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys! This is my first avengers fic in a while, but oh my god if Endgame didn't get my fic ideas spinning. I've had this idea for ages and was waiting for the right time to write it and while I'm completely shattered now and have no idea if this fic is any good I wanted to write it down and share my ideas with you guys. (Also when I'm more awake and read over this I might rewrite the same concept. Not quite sure right now though.)  
> That scene was at the very beginning and it had my heart breaking from the start. I love Nebula so much and I think her relationship with Tony and what went on in that ship is so fun to explore.
> 
> Anyway I hope you enjoyed this! Please leave a comment. Also tell me if you have any Nebula and Tony headcannons, I'd love to read them and maybe write a few if there's something you guys would think would make a cool fic. I think this is something that should be explored and there deffo should be more fanfiction for it!!  
> Thanks!


End file.
